PRESEASON GAME 1

Welcome to the 2009 Doggity Chiefs Report. This marks the 8th season of the Doggity Report, but the first season of the new "blog" format, and the first season of the Pioli/Haley era. As in previous seasons, the pre-season Dogg will be an abbreviated version, with the full Doggity coming with the regular season, game one - at the Baltimore Ravens.

Once again, special thanks to the Illustrious Potentate, George Blowfish for his steadfast support of my flighty behavior. He will make someone a good wife.

PRESEASON - GAME 1 - Old Texans VS New Texans at THE NEW HEAD.

Score: Chiefs 10, Texans 16.

Weather: Sloppy

Overall impression of last night's mess game: They lost.

- 3 takeaway ratio. The only TD by Daffy Duck. Not something to write home about. Impression of the stadium remodel: 3-1/2 stars. Looks better than The K. Concourses are much better, as are the johns and the vittles. But I'm sorry -- WHAT HAPPENED TO THE RING OF HONOR? I dig the new ribbon display, but putting the Chiefs honor guard on that thing sporadically throughout the game ain't good enough. I want to SEE the names.

The Offense:

Cassel, and the 1's on offense were not impressive, mustering just two first downs (one was a freebee on a penalty), and never getting into enemy territory. Cassel completed just two passes, but had a couple of good looking throws dropped, he also fumbled a snap. Croyle and the #2 O looked better. Thigpen did his zany, running around like loon thing that he did all last year, and managed an ugly, off-balance, back-across-his-body, broken-play pass to the TE for a TD, like he did last year. All-in-all, the QB position looks OK. I think we have three guys who can run the offense, without a huge drop-off. Of course, when you're on the kiddie-slide, there isn't far to drop. The offensive line was offensive. LJ did his Claude Raines impersonation and vanished. Jackie Battle may be the best running back on this team. Dwayne Bowe may be a practice field slacker, but he's a game day play-maker, and Haley needs to get over the pea under his mattress that this kid represents, and let him start. It's not like the rest of the receivers have any clue what they're doing.

The Defense:

The D was somewhat less awful. They looked lost on several plays, like they had no idea what zip code they were supposed to be in. Especially the linebackers. On Houston's TD drive, the LBs looked like they needed mapquest to figure out where they were going. They have a lot of work to do in the 3-4. Andy Studebaker and Corey Mays looked solid, and Tamba Hali appears to be adjusting to his new position. Brandon Flowers should be a Pro Bowler, if he continues to advance at this pace. I am still not sold on Bernard Pollard in passing situations. I have to wonder if Glenn Dorsey has a career plan B?

The Special Teams:

Kickers were OK, although Colquitt -- the team MVP from last year -- had a couple of ugly ducklings. Of course, it was pouring down rain. Suckup - Mr Irrelevant - did what was asked of him. Special bus team coverage was not that great, but the return game was worse. This team is still trying to find a guy who can walk and chew gum at the same time to put back for kicks. So far it's "chomp-step-chomp-step".

The Awards:

"Throw Him A Bone" goes to Corey Mays. A guy that even his momma has to look up his name on the depth chart. Yet he played a very solid game at linebacker. He performed well against the run and was in the backfield more than some of Houston's running backs. He and Andy Studebaker shone on defense, but I went with Mays. He managed to not get himself hurt, and had a bit of an edge.

"The Doggity Dog" goes to Brandon Albert. This guy is supposed to be the stud of an otherwise sub-par O-line. He was a speed bump a couple of times in this game - barely slowing down the rusher on the quarterback expressway.

Next week - break camp and play the Vikings in Minneapolis. We will have the training camp overview next week.

Your faithful scribe

Mr. Doggity